토요일, 5월 18, 2024
HomeCyclingThe Indignity Of Shopping for Used Crap – Bike Snob NYC

The Indignity Of Shopping for Used Crap – Bike Snob NYC


Name me Fred.

[Spotted by a reader.]

I’m about 80% of the way in which by way of “Moby Dick” now (technically “Moby-Dick” for those who’re a Literary Fred) and so immersed am I in it that I see Dick in every single place I’m going. And like tempestuous Ahab pacing the deck of the Pequod upon his whalebone peg-leg, I too am suffering from my very own white whale, that being a pair of Spinergys:

[It is said that a full-grown Cipollini can produce more oil than a mature sperm whale.]

It began once I was plying the seas of Craigslist and noticed this publish:

As a semi-professional blogger at present engaged in an in depth evaluation of a classic carbon-and-titanium racing bike, I figured these wheels can be helpful for each scientific and novelty functions. So, on a whim, I proffered a modest provide, and as I beforehand associated I used to be soundly rebuffed:

I figured that was that, however then an nameless benefactor provided to subsidize the acquisition. So I despatched one other message to the vendor agreeing to pay the total quantity, assured that the wheels would now be mine:

Oddly, no reply was forthcoming, and because the wheels drifted additional and additional away, my need for them solely elevated. “Maybe they’ve already been offered,” I believed to myself, however once I looked for the publish the subsequent morning, not solely was it nonetheless up, however the vendor had lowered his worth to $150:

Solely a madman would ignore or refuse a suggestion for his full asking worth solely to cut back it by 25% the very subsequent day, and so I figured the one logical clarification was that he had not seen my second electronic mail in any respect. And so, undaunted, I despatched a brand new one:

The reply got here instantly:

I did as instructed. The wheels had been now tantalizingly shut–so shut I may think about myself thumbing a pair of tires onto them. However out of the clear sky got here a sudden squall that blew them violently out to sea:

I ought to level out that these screenshots comprise the whole lot of his messages, and that his curt replies had been at no level embellished with phrases equivalent to “please” or “thanks” or some other type of well mannered discourse. Moreover, the ZIP code he signifies is within the neighborhood of Ithaca, NY, which is nicely over 200 miles away from New York Metropolis. So while I endeavor to offer each human the good thing about the doubt, I admit I discover it each puzzling and vexing that somebody would act irritated and put-upon by another person providing to offer him cash for one thing he’s listed on the market on a public discussion board. Moreover, I discover it doubly puzzling and vexing that regardless of being nowhere close to New York Metropolis he’d compose the publish in such a manner that it reveals the wheels mere steps from the subway line I experience not less than twice every week:

With regard to this latter level, I figured I ought to convey this to his consideration, if solely as a result of I didn’t need him to suppose I used to be the type of schmuck who replies to classifieds itemizing in Ithaca and provides to select up the products in Manhattan. So I despatched the next message, full with screenshot exhibiting the map:

And but as I kind this the publish continues to be reside, with no indication in any way of the vendor’s location aside from a map of Manhattan with a pin in it proper within the neighborhood of 14th Road and seventh Avenue::

Examine his comportment with that of, say, this vendor, to select one roughly at random:

Not solely is he clear about his location, however he clearly understands that purchasing and promoting requires a certain quantity of communication, even when it does require one to work together with the occasional looky-loo. Sure, invariably he’ll get the odd electronic mail like, “Will this work on my fixie?,” and “I’ll offer you $75, will you ship these to Poughkeepsie?” However ultimately an occasion will occur upon them, they’ll shoot just a few emails forwards and backwards, they’ll change cash for items, and the wheels of commerce will proceed to roll straight and true.

After all, by this level a sane particular person would surrender the hunt. (Truly, a sane particular person would have given it up after his preliminary provide was refused–or, most sanely, by no means made a suggestion within the first place.) Nonetheless, I’m a semi-professional bike blogger, not knowledgeable sane particular person, and so I hereby nail my doubloon the mast and declare that if any of you dozens of readers on the market occur to reside within the Ithaca space and need to buy these wheels for me I’ll fortunately reimburse you for the $150 and the transport to New York Metropolis, plus a bit beer cash on your troubles. And naturally I’d implore you to deal with the vendor respectfully and never in any manner disclose that you simply’re in cahoots with that schmuck in New York Metropolis who saved emailing him. I don’t need vindication and I don’t need to violate his privateness in any manner; all I need is the wheels.

Within the meantime, like Ahab pacing on a prosthetic limb comprised of the bone of the very species that torments him, I’ll simply sit right here and stare at my Spinergy clock:

I could not have any Spinergys, however I’ve obtained tons and plenty of time.

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